Where are all my angels?

Where are all my angels?

Where are all of my angels when I am falling
down to the ground, I am only human so it is
not a matter of if but when I trip every now
and again. I am an addict so my demons
have grown so far beyond, causing it to be
so very hard for me to want to wake up in
the morning and rise up out of bed, not
knowing what the day will bring, I feel so all
alone most days wanting to just give
up and give in and let them win in all of the
battles that I have been fighting in letting
them have full control of my oh so broken
heart and damaged soul, so that I will no
longer feel all of the pain of this life I have
learned to hate from a world so cold, and
now I live in a state of constant fear that for
me it may be to late as the love that once
filled me and hope that God gave me slip
farther out of my reach as I now sink
drowning in a sea of sorrow dragged down
even further by regret of past indecisions
and lack of my inner strength after giving up
on my faith of a God who is not as perfect
as people think and as I fall down to my
knees raise my head as I scream why? God
why? What is the purpose of our lives
to live and suffer every single day? To fear
the unknown? To kill each other over the
color of our skin? Why? Because regardless
of what they all believe how perfect can you
be? After all my Glory, my Lord, my King,
you did create me and our so-called humanity
in your own image and as you can plainly
see we are far from and will never be perfect
so really if I was you I would just erase us
like we never happened and forget this disaster
and try again, so I ask once again where are
my angels as I fall? Where is my God as I pray
for help to take away all of this pain I am in?
Please God give me something I mean anything
so that I can believe in you in me or just take
me home so I can give the demons my middle
finger and let my soul spread its wings and be
free

Richard M Knittle Jr. ©
© A #Poets Journey