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Everyone knows that life has not been kind to me over the past few years, everytime I think that everything will be alright, it is not again, I feel like baby bird spreading my wings to fly yet every time I jump of the limb Ii fall hard to the ground just to start all over again, then I have been stuck in a very difficult relationship angry, lost, hurt, confused, not sure if I was going crazy pushed to edge where I finally found myself at the precibus of greatness, standing on the edge of insanity until a fan contacted me and explained what a narcissist is and then another and another, I am so very lucky to have the ability to write poetry, because the few fans that I do have are the greatest in the world and beyond everyone of you is an angel, who by interacting with me and reading what I write saved my life in so many different ways. This morning which is two weeks from my birthday I logged into the computer and browsed to numberonemusic.com and I saw this below (The photo's) wh…

I could use a friend

I could use a friend
I could use a friend right now someone I can talk to about how I am feeling and what I should do,and even this and that but when I take a good look around me to see if I could find one, what I found was there was none to be seen, not even a sound, I even used to have a best friend once hell we did some pretty crazy things together but most of all we always had a lot of fun, she always made me feel just like I was young again she made me know that I meant something to her and someone, so anytime she called I was always there for her in time of need for anything at all even it it was just a shoulder to cry on or a chest to lay, or even making love on the floor by a fireplace, tears now fill my eyes whenever I think of her I miss the most her beautiful smile and her pretty face but even more if I was having a bad day out of no where she would lean over and kiss me then hold me tight telling me things that I needed to hear, like everything is going

i am only human

I am only human

I am but just only a human so tears will fall
when I am hurt or sad and even when I am happy
that it has touched me deep down to my soul,
I weep for others whom I cannot help like
the many homeless men, women, and children
who are living out on the streets only just
trying to find some shelter out of the cold and
heat hungry scraping together food and drink
while some have mental health issues and
will most likely never find a cure while others
are addicts who will either figure it out and climb
out while others I am sad to say will not and
this evil disease will take another friend or stranger
maybe even a family member not if but when and
how while others only wander with nowhere the
target yet still are lost to the world and worse yet
within themselves because maybe a child has
died causing a full mental break down I know I
would go completely crazy or just maybe lost
the only job they ever new or just forgot who they
were maybe a hero back from some god forsaking
war lost …

All I want to be in this life

All I want to be in this life
All I want to be in this life
is to be loved for once before I
die, to be held in somebody's
arms telling me that everything
is okay and it will be alright,
to be touched by hands
that is so tender and soft
you would swear you were
being touched by a ghost and
to be kissed, yes, to be kissed
on the cheek or on the lips by
someone who kisses me back
and means it, all I want to be
in this life is to be loved for
once before I die, to know that
I am loved back and all of the
reasons why to never feel so
lonely like I do now in fear
of dying all alone with nobody
else anywhere around, to hold
hands while we are walking
down the street not afraid to
show some affection and not
embarrassed of who you might
see or may meet, to feel the
the honesty in all your words
that you say to me in our truthful
emotions in our dedications of
our precious most inner
feelings, to walk together
through all of the sickness and
even health, all I want to be in
this life is to be loved for once
before I die, …

Let me hold you in my arms

Let me hold you in my arms
Let me hold you in my arms for as long as you will let me while  we are making love until the daylight fades away, we can try to forget
about what may come tomorrow as we are trying to live our entire lives
today, If the morning starts without me it means that it was time for
me to go, just know that I will always love you until forever never
comes at all, I am sorry for leaving you so lonely but I know you
will be okay as I will treasure every single moment that we had
together always wishing for one day, the angels have come
down from heaven to wake me up from my restless sleep, finally
answering all of my prayers by taking all of my pain away while
giving me my angel wings so I could fly back home to stay. I know
that I will miss you and you will miss me more even though we
stole as much time as we could. We both knew someday this time
might come yet never knowing when that day the doctors
told us that the battle was over I had no chance to win. Our lives
are filled wit…

I am in love with a fallen angel plus a bonus...

I am in love with a fallen angel


One of the saddest days that I have ever had in my
whole entire life thus far, was the day that I held the
most beautiful woman I have ever known, tightly in
my arms as she trembled against my body that was
filled with more love for her then she could ever even
imagine and it was raging inside of me with flames
smoldering like a fire burning out of control with so
much passion that she herself or even anyone else
for that matter would ever know, meanwhile a flood
of tears were falling down soaking the ground like
a bad winters storm somewhere out in the middle
of the ocean from the deep dark sadness of her big
brown sexy eyes that were reflecting all the signs of
a hidden sorrow and the shadows that were left over
of her much regretful past that seems to follow her
everywhere she now goes, as she sobbed and cried
uncontrollably which was coming from her heart that
had been badly broken into a million pieces so many
times in fact that it just may ne…

Locked away deep inside

Locked away deep inside
I still have a photograph of you that I
have always carried with me stored
away forever deep in my heart so that
whenever I close my eyes I can see
it every night when I am dreaming
about you and me like it was when
we used to be not all that long ago, I
also, have all of the memories of
you and I that are imprinted
deep down in my very soul that I
wrap close around me like when
you used to hold me whenever the
nights got lonely and so very cold,
but today if we ever meet and you
asked me how am I doing, I would
say that I was "doing okay" but
I already know that the real truth of
of the matter is if you could
only read what was on my mind you
would know that I was lying to you
because there is not a single day
that goes by in this life of mine that
I am not thinking always about you,
and so you know even after all this
the time you are always on my mind. I
do not know why but somehow in
some way you are still locked away
inside of me, I still today in the
middle of night wait by…