Friends back home

Friends Back Home

Sitting on a bench at the park all by myself one day
feeling like I was all alone and a little afraid of what
was to happen in the coming days, so I closed my eyes
for just a few minutes and right away my memories
came rushing back to me bringing with them all of the
images of the many mistakes I had ever made along
with those feelings that went with them, so I tried really
hard to open my eyes but I could not to my surprise,
the thoughts now in my mind kept looking back on
the life that I once had way back in my past and all
of the chances that I had to do or become just about
anybody or anything at all, then it started to show
all of the choices that I have ever made back then
that had caused me today to fall flat on my ass, it
made me laugh out loud then I cried real hard, I felt
all the pain all over again and all the joy from the
births of all my sons and breakups of my three wives
that still hurts my heart today, it showed me so
much, but I think out of everything that I missed
the most were those days when my closest friends
were close back now it seems in a time when
we were all going to the drive-in or Zuma beach
maybe even hope town in my good buddy Gary's
jeep doing one hundred and ten mph off-roading to
whiteface or where ever we were going hanging out
at Marks house making funny voices or jumping
of his roof into a pool now was our oasis or hanging
with Rod or Andy at the street races watching that
Chevelle kicking asses and Steven making those
funny faces playing dungeons and dragons with
Wade and Chris with our thieves and Mages then
getting a little older going to the rodeo on a Friday
night or a weekend show while I would ride a bull
or two hit the ground hard dust myself off look into
the crowd smiled when they all laughed then go
out dancing all night long drinking hooping and
hollering getting drunk then puking outside by the
car, on that dance floor we two-stepped down the
hall while waltzing around my good friend Mark's
The Silver Dollar bar with Harold drinking the music
jamming by the Winslow band or even Rick Tucker
damn that man could jam we had David God rest
his soul behind the bar and Debbie or Kerri serving
rum and coke with heavy alcohol, then from the
silence two teardrops fall and sadness comes on
strong remembering our good friends Bob and Mary
who had died way too damn young and I remember
at the memorial when I stood up on stage to sing
a song called Friends in low places but I was so wrong
because they were not low No, not at all, Robbie and
I are kinda just like brothers but with different mothers and
fathers growing up together going through a hell of
a lot, and then Joyce and Dennis I can still remember
when they met at the bar one day oh they had one hell
of a wedding that is still talked about today, then
a feeling of a kind of peace came over me with my
eyes still closed but something was different for now
I could somehow see for in our lives we live which
sometimes seem like there are many, there are so
many choices that we all will need to make, some
are wrong and some right either way life is a constant
battle one big fight, so just take it one day at a time
step by step until the very end, and if one day you
feel like you are all alone, remember you still have
God and all your friends back home.

Poet Richard M Knittle Jr.
A Poet's Journey
A Texas Poet Laureate
Nominee 2016-2020