How the ink begin to flow (Part One)

How the ink begin to flow

(Part One) 

I guess the number one question that

I get asked is who am I? Well I guess

that depends on who you ask, what I

mean by that is I have been called

just about everything under sun some

say I am a friend, others say I am only a stranger while a few call me an 

enemy that they wish they never met, 

all because I fell in love once upon a

time ago with the most beautiful of

fallen angels I ever met at least that

was the lie that I had told myself 

which was that she had saved me 

from a life of loneliness and misery 

by just being there and holding me 

when my life was filled with nothing

more than deep despair but before 

I can really begin the story which 

is one of love and betrayal that had

started with the truth of how I felt 

but ended with her denial of what it 

was worth, so let me start off by 

going back to the very beginning of 

all time, you see everyone who has

actually read the Bible or has gone 

to church already knows the story of

how the Devil, yes the very same

demon who is the epitome of hate 

and evil who was once one of God

closest angels and friend who sat 

right next to God's throne but fell fast

from His grace by wanting to be God

himself and all of his wonderus glory

who then got himself thrown out of 

the golden gates of heaven abruptly 

on his ass, so he took all his hate

and anger out on man by creating all 

of those things that destroy humanity

from deep down within causing an

acute case of insanity to reign

champion over what is reality which

now in its actually creates a high 

rate of mortality in the morality by

destroying the world more and more

everyday as it lives within me too

which then causes a deep down 

rooted depression to step in so I 

start to self medicate to help take

all the pain away so then I am an 

addict which is born now inside of

me, which I truly am but most

definitely a full functioning one 

which I believe is truly not an addict

like my twelve step brethren say

after all, after all addiction is a 

disease that has no cure that kills 

many people and even more families

year after year it is an affliction that 

will grow inside of you that you

cannot stop if your all alone it will

change who you were and what you 

are taking a piece of your heart, 

mind and and soul until one day 

you just disappear forever lost in 

the addiction replaced by your own

demons usually before that though 

your friends and your family will

have given up on you only saying

something like "just know that I

will always love you and I know

that at one time you loved me but

I would rather remember the old

you and not the one that I now see"

then you really are all alone all by

yourself one day transformed into 

a completely different person and 

believe me it is not for the better 

either, then one day not all that long 

ago either maybe by accident or 

even fate I met who I thought was

my soul mate who today I now know

was not and that is where the real

story begins for that is when hell

itself begin to engulf me as I started 

walking hand in hand with my own

demons on the path of my own 

self destruction and how by the 

grace of God go I. 

How the ink begin to flow 

(Part One) 

Poet Richard M Knittle Jr.

A Poet's Journey