Spilled Ink from the heart and soul of Poet and Author Richard M Knittle Jr.

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Many of us fight the cold lonely battle of the darkness called depression every day, it is a constant war throughout our life. It is something we must fight just to to stay alive. Believe me you are not alone as I walk down the same path with you. Please remember that suicide is not painless and it is never the answer to the questions we seek. THINK ABOUT THIS. You are never alone for I am here for you and just know this someone does love you. God loves you Jesus loves you. And the one person who says love is dead me, I love you too. Demons These demons that I have been fighting I know are for real, from all of the scars on my heart to this pain that will never heal. Some days I lay in my bed to go to sleep but at night I am still awake, for all of the bad ones have taken all of my dreams  to forsake. I fear that my fate has been already been sealed so even with God's help I tried the I tried the very best that I could, but I believe my world this one that I had once loved is now o...

All these months of feeling sick some days I'm tired and want to sleep some nights awake but want to sleep tossing and turning first I'm hot then cold so I finally Google my symptoms good news I am not really sick bad news is I am just extremely horny. Poet Richard M Knittle Jr. 

  Here is to all the lonely people: Here is to all those lost and lonely people who have lived their lives trapped in a world of deep sadness while always feeling as if they were all alone, no matter what they were doing, where they were, or who might be around, whose cries for help every day go unanswered, from their screams that make no sounds, living somewhere in their nightmares where all their hopes and dreams will not be found. Here is to all the lonely people who have lived locked away somewhere within their own minds caused by mental illnesses where diagnosing is sometimes hard to find. Here is to all the lonely people who live in agonizing pain, coming from the scars of a broken heart that will never be the same, who have lost a war of finding love in the battles that rage on. Searching their entire lifetime just to find that love is just a lie causing tears to fall to the ground Here's to all the lonely people left behind by love hurt broken afraid to reach out for fear...

There are things in life There are things in this life that you can never get back because once they are used they are lost forever to us so be careful with how you use them if you are not they will turn into regret and sometimes eat you up from the inside. The first one is the word after it is said, the second would be an opportunity after it is missed, and the third is time after it is gone, and trust once it is lost. I know there is more if you think about it but these are some at the top of the list and in my mind the word is the number one because after all, I am a poet so words come easily to me but with that gift comes great responsibility for words can kill they have started great wars, brought down entire kingdoms, slaughter innocent lives, and much more they can destroy relationships as they have several of mine they can bring two people together than tear them apart while healing them over time yet words can also help heal, end battles, and bring significant change for the ...

I just thought maybe I needed to get some things said that have been rolling around in my head because we all say things we don't mean to say because we do not know how, or other people are around so we become afraid to tell each other for fear of rejection or to be ridiculed or laughed or even made fun of so instead we say not what is inside of us but what we think you want to hear and that is a problem. I know I am getting older I am definitely a lot slower my body is falling apart and I am fifty-six I feel like I am eighty-six  some mornings my mind thinks it is twelve on more occasions than not but it does not keep me from loving you as much as I do even after everything I have been through, I am amazed that I can love anybody at all, but you are special to me and always have been and It would be almost impossible for me to explain exactly what and how I feel for and about you to you or anybody else including myself because I cannot fully understand or grasp the amounts  o...

I guess we really did it huh? We went and got hitched, tied the knot, hooked up, shacked up, coupled, merged formed an alliance like star wars or not dear, had our big day, become nuptials had a wedding and a marriage ceremony I said I do you said it too then the preacher said I now pronounce you husband and wife and we kissed for like fifteen seconds when the guard yelled Hey that's enough of that we shook our heads I said that nobody will believe it and that was it we were married, and I got the license to prove it. You looked so hot with your hair all curled up and your face beautifully made up wearing all white with those black strips with and property of TDCJ in big bold letters stamped on the back of it, we said goodbye I love you then they took you back to your cell I smiled and yelled, you are so beautiful I remember thinking what in the hell are you doing man she is doing 3-5 years in state prison, why does it feel like I am on a reality television series called married w...

  Secrets of love and lust What I love about you sweetheart is that you already know that you are beautiful you have heard it a million times before from every guy that you meet but you just smile with a sexy grin and say thank you are very sweet your humbleness comes from inside of you from the same place all your real beauty rest I need you to know That you are an exceptional woman God broke a mold on you, that is for sure. Having beauty like you do both on the inside and out is something extraordinarily remarkable that makes you a very special woman in this world that we now live that there is no doubt for wherever you may go the darkness will run and hide because of the light that shines from your sexy smile that I am missing very much. It has been entirely way too long and I am looking forward to seeing you again so I can look into your beautiful green eyes that sparkle like emeralds out in the sun so I can see way down deep inside of you and watch and listen to your heart and...

IF THE SUN WENT COLD.    IF THE SUN WENT COLD AND THE NIGHTTIME FILLED THE SKY THIS WORLD WOULD STILL LIVE ON INDEED AS IT WILL FINALLY SEE WHAT I HAVE SEEN ALL THE YEARS I HAVE KNOWN YOU ALL OF THE INCREDIBLE BEAUTY THAT SHINES THROUGH FROM DEEP DOWN INSIDE OF YOU FROM YOUR HEART AND SOUL WHICH I ALREADY OWN A PIECE OF JUST AS YOU OWN A PIECE OF MINE IT IS QUITE FUNNY THAT LIFE AND LOVE ARE BOTH FOUR LETTER WORDS AND WE HAVE BOTH LIVED THROUGH BOTH MEANINGS THAT IS WHY MOST PEOPLE ARE AFRAID OF THEM THAT IS WHY I AM SO GLAD WE MET ALL THESE YEARS AGO AND I CANNOT SEE ME GOING THROUGH LIFE WITHOUT YOU AND AS LONG AS I HAVE YOU RIGHT NEXT TO ME ENJOYING OUR LIVES TOGETHER, UNTIL THE ANGELS FLY DOWN AND TAKE ME WITH THEM TO HEAVEN WHERE I WILL BE LOOKING DOWN MISSING YOU WATCHING OVER YOU AND KEEPING YOU SAFE FROM EVIL SO IF I SEE THAT YOU ARE IN TROUBLE OR HEAR MY NAME BEING SPOKEN, I WILL BE STANDING RIGHT THERE NEXT TO YOU TO GIVE YOU A H...

  One day soon one day soon I will be okay, for there will be no more sadness filling my lonely soul that now surrounds me, like the bars in a prison cell that hold me confined by shackles, keeping me from living a life that I used to know, one that was filled with so much joy and happiness like a school-aged little boy waking up to all the presents on a cool clear Christmas morning, smiling and laughing like there was nothing else that really mattered in the world, but now here I lay with the fear of waking up each day as the tears start to fall for no good reason at all, while nobody can understand these emotions I feel for they are all way beyond even my complete control. No, I cannot just take another pill, then force a fake smile at will, then act as if everything will just go away, so please do not tell me just to chill, or that it is only in my head because it is very real, and I live with it every night and day, now all I can say is nothing matters with the sound of death ...