The map on my heart

The scars and jagged lines that you see
on my poor beat-up heart, look just like ones on
a road map showing the many paths, roads
and highways that I have taken throughout
my life, take this one that curves around
the south or bottom of my heart that is when I
met a woman down in California I fell in love
got married had two kids (my oldest boys) and tried
to make a living but somehow we got lost and ended
on two different roads and directions yet
even today after all of these many years I still
have a love for her with the beat of my heart,
then when I was not looking I veered off
the main road down a dirt path that had
been traveled by few there I stopped to
quench my thirst listening to the band that
was playing they were called Winslow and
they were damn good, then I saw her, she
was standing up by the bar so I walked
over and introduced myself and the next
thing I know we were headed to Reno to
start our new life down another road where
again not too long after she got another ride
this scar and that one were roads I took
that ended up dead ends so I had to turn
around looking for another road to take me
back home but I got sidetrack where I had
my third son, I was cruising not really looking
for anything in particular or anyone when
I saw her we talked and danced and had a little
fun a few days later she called me and
came by where we drove together down the
road got married a few years after the baby
came along I thought this one would last but
I was mistaken so not long after I packed
my bags took out my map and drove on
down the road where I would end up, I really did not
know but this line and that scar and this
one right here is what was left of my broken
once again took time to heal as I got lost here
and there then one day I was at the crossroads
there were so many paths and roads to take
I was not sure which way to go so I closed my
eyes and took a shot and took a chance driving
a road that was full of broken cars when I saw
her standing right there in the middle of the
road so I stopped and I asked would you like a
ride? I should have known better when she licked
her lips jumped in right next to me and said
thank you handsome you might want to hold
on tight, I will show you a few shortcuts to get
us there fast then she kissed me on the lips
when I must have passed out for just a minute
maybe more then the next thing I knew we were
flying down the road picking up speed the further
we drove turning down this path then that
path to this road and that one as everything
begin to blur I think I passed out but I was not
sure when I woke up she was driving us down
a road that had never seen when I asked where
we are going she turned and looked at me she
said does it really matter with all the fun we have
don't worry husband just do what I want and it
will be okay so sit back close your eyes let me
show you a good time so I listened for a while
and I have to say she was right but something
I felt was just not quite right even though she
looked like an angel I could find no halo or
wings only two spots on head that I swear were
her horns then I closed my eyes saw nightmares
and dreams for forever it seemed when I woke
up I found myself in the backseat of my car
naked all alone without my keys so I threw on
this and that got out of the car looked around
found nothing but some words on the ground
with an arrow that said do you know where you
are? One mile up the road will be the last stop
before its, the end buckle up to hang on it is your
last ride thank you for taking the highway to hell
right then I remembered and tears begin to fall
I thought what time is it how long have I been
driving around and around right then a light
appeared right before my eyes shining down
from high above into my eye what I saw was the
past and all the things I had done which brought
me to my knees and praying to God asking for
forgiveness for my many sins then I felt my heart
beating as I let him in, then as if they were always
right there I found my keys already in the ignition
so I started the car the engine growled as I turned
the car around I looked back in the mirror just in time
to see that girl running as fast as should calling
my name but looked forward and stood on the gas
watching as her vision got smaller and smaller until
she was gone I took a deep breath and I said thank
God, and I kept driving until I felt safe and here we are
now showing you my scars and lines that fill up
my heart so now when I travel and I get a little lost
I just close my eyes then look inside of me and I
find my way home by following my heart.

Poet Richard M Knittle Jr.
A #Poets Journey


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