My life for the last fifteen years

 My life for the last fifteen years

My life for the last fifteen years as I have
lived it was filled with nothing more
than chaos, sadness, and confusion
caused by a demon who is part devil himself
that was disguised as an angel who
was filled with nothing more than sin,
I realize now that all of those
years I had wasted on a crazy narcissistic
creature that only knew how to lie,
cheat, and steal, her soul has been
missing and was presumably dead
along with a heart that pumped nothing
but cold icy blood and was as black as the night
even coal, I woke up every morning
with the feeling of nothing but helplessness
and misery while being abused, even
when the night fell all of her promises
never came true as I only wished for human
touch yet always slept all alone
being called
names like a bully that would always hurt
me as she was playing her stupid games
then laughing at the end results
her cheating was constant something she
did all the time, so now I am raising a son
who is not even mine.
Then one day I got very sick and I was
Slowly, painfully dying, I was barely alive
Yet she kept on lying, then starting fights
keeping me stressed while trying to make
me die after all the years that I stood
by her side, no matter what she did
this or that time then she
left me alone with no support to raise
her children so she could live a fantasy life
all by herself, walking away from us
for another who is a sick messed up
loser trading us in for drugs and sex
becoming a dope whore just like her
sister is making movies that nobody
would see charming all the ladies who never
knew they were only In the devil's lair unaware
of the camera being filmed while they lay there
her mind is all rotted her teeth are all gone her mind
is so sick and twisted from the dope he gives
her so she believes It is fun her body still
covered with stretch marks and bruises
beat up by a bully and only used when there
is nobody else around it is sad to see someone
who has fallen so low she barely talks to her
Children because they all know what she does.
and only sees them when he lets her or when
she has time
Trying hard to fit in but she will never be a
mother no never again she is an addict the
worst kind who cares for nothing but
herself cannot
love anyone except for herself I am
Sure one day she will get sober but by
that time it will be way to late her kids
will be grown and will have all moved a way
She will never see them again until they
bury her six foot down then they will visit her
grave spit in it then they will all walk away
never will they speak her name again.
Poet Richard M Knittle Jr.
A Poet's Journey

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