My life for the last fifteen years

 My life for the last fifteen years

My life for the last fifteen years as I have

lived it was filled with nothing more

than chaos, sadness, and confusion

caused by a demon who is part devil himself

that was disguised as an angel who

was filled with nothing more than sin,

I realize now that all of those

years I had wasted on a crazy narcissistic

creature that only knew how to lie,

cheat, and steal, her soul has been

missing and was presumably dead

along with a heart that pumped nothing

but cold icy blood and was as black as the night

even coal, I woke up every morning

with the feeling of nothing but helplessness

and misery while being abused, even

when the night fell all of her promises

never came true as I only wished for human

touch yet always slept all alone

being called

names like a bully that would always hurt

me as she was playing her stupid games

then laughing at the end results

her cheating was constant something she

did all the time, so now I am raising a son

who is not even mine.

Then one day I got very sick and I was

Slowly, painfully dying, I was barely alive

Yet she kept on lying, then starting fights

keeping me stressed while trying to make

me die after all the years that I stood

by her side, no matter what she did

this or that time then she

left me alone with no support to raise

her children so she could live a fantasy life

all by herself, walking away from us

for another who is a sick messed up

loser trading us in for drugs and sex

becoming a dope whore just like her

sister is making movies that nobody

would see charming all the ladies who never

knew they were only In the devil's lair unaware

of the camera being filmed while they lay there

her mind is all rotted her teeth are all gone her mind

is so sick and twisted from the dope he gives

her so she believes It is fun her body still

covered with stretch marks and bruises

beat up by a bully and only used when there

is nobody else around it is sad to see someone

who has fallen so low she barely talks to her

Children because they all know what she does.

and only sees them when he lets her or when

she has time

Trying hard to fit in but she will never be a

mother no never again she is an addict the

worst kind who cares for nothing but

herself cannot

love anyone except for herself I am

Sure one day she will get sober but by

that time it will be way to late her kids

will be grown and will have all moved a way

She will never see them again until they

bury her six foot down then they will visit her

grave spit in it then they will all walk away

never will they speak her name again.

Poet Richard M Knittle Jr.

A Poet's Journey